Being Selfish even to disappear.....

Yes ..I am definitely one of the most selfish people around..
To be true I need you more every day.....and accomplish my mission of being found..
Off course by you....missing you is not a habit..
Its runs inside me...just using my blog time and again to vomit..

So called unexplained emotions let me loose of myself....its true it happens at times..
No hesitation to admit..I am still into you....and I am simply not trying to despise.
I do not want you to take mercy on me...and feel guilty of making me what I have begun..
As its the price I paid..for loving you more than anyone could have imagined and done..

Hard to explain how it feels every day....cribbing inside..hiding my tears...
Not to fall infront of everyone..But its true..I have felt your voice in my ears..
Trying to explain and move on...But what If it was so easily said and done..
Would have not sticked to you...despite the fact I am no way close to you to propose..

Yes..I do feel bad about me..being lonely..sitting in here infront of the system ..filling my world with words..
Of love..faith and hope.....thinking some how it might reach up there....As I miss you waiting on those roads..
Is actually living in the old times....expecting it to work..to see us together..
The truth is....I was not the best...only option left is to quietly disappear..