BANDA GOOD HAI YAARRRRR





Tired of hearing this word many a time in my day from my friends. Not boasting about my self, but has happened many a times. And every time I am forced to think that why me, and not any one else. Some time or else most of the time I fell glad to be to have been appreciated. But is this the reason I started writing to rediscover my self, God knows...Tough is to imagine what all I have had lost in the past. As the memories still haunt me, and makes me hestitant each time I try to do some thing. I am sharing no examples for my life time.

But may be or I think must be the case only , that this so called BANDA is the culprit of the situation everytime.Is it I am not suitable to be in this world or that I belong to the STONE AGE ...still living in the age old basic fundas of not to hurt any one intentionally or un intentionally. But what about my feelings..some of friends thing I do not have them..Yes its true, but they are still my friends, not that I am not having any option, but because I still believe in them. Perhaps they are some time true. The time has passed by, the scars are no where to hide..I just wanted a single..m repeating a single person to be mine..Destiny or else fate I hold responsible for my present situation. Or else I am my self to be blamed. Tough question ,and more confusing are the answers to it. How could the person reading this hold the key to my problems..Or is it I am deprived,or else I just think I am...Or is it I am for the first time surrendering to just one thing. That I never ever got..ie the OS CALLED TRUE LOVE..and how come it become so much important to me.e..Seriously have got no answer to this..Why do I mail the goody goody mails to every one..dont know..Am I expecting too much from life or my friends..or else the FAILED EXPECTATIONS or the COMMITMENTS made me think of all this..The hole paragraphis confusing ..so is mylife at present...

Some times I think , am I a psycho or mad..as the others some times think I am..
Dont know what to say , what to convey..just want the happiness on the face to stay..