You My fruit....is the reason :)

Amazing is the feeling when I talk to you.....through my blog..
Feels as if..you are next here with me..holding you new prop..
Stuck in my own world of "imagination"...only to be with my "One"....
Some times I feel..how could you never realized missing all the fun..

With the "plan" all freezed...to perfection...and  trust me..a mere "kiss" will not be just for an "observation"..
Much more are in the store for expectations....if you could feel what I wanted to say in this situation..
Moving towards the "next"...has been some what  become a most obvious reason to find "you"..
Every time the "face" changes me to remind me.....what if...I would have said to you "I do"..

We would have been together from last summer...completing a year..
Before you ask...I would say "yes" remembering the past does hurt...and grapples me in fear...
As I say it to you..a tear rolls down my cheek in despair ....with a wish in my heart..
Hoping against hope of having my dream to actually realize.....as if it was love from the very start..

My so called state...might be a sad one...I feel broken and bruised..unable to accept the truth and move on..
But still...I am crawling at my pace to reach the end.....only to have a glimpse of you..
For me...it has always been the your love..which  has sounded up close to the truth...
What if..I was not able to taste your love as my own fruit...

Wear my shoes...you STUPID..LITTLE IDIOT "DILMEET"...

That is the reason I get....with people begging me to put me in their shoes and realize..
What they have gone through in thier life....."Stressing" on the fact..dont worry just throw the dice..
As always usually..people think and consider me as their mice..
Pulling the plug ..moving away...with the most "abnoxious" reasons..handing me their slice..

Off course..none of my "prospective" one came to offer a reason..why not me ??
Me being a stupid little idiot posed myself with many names...requesting me to set free..
So far none of this has happened to ...except for me still looking at the "tree"..
I question myself...When it actually start ??..I replied it was a "stone" being thrown...cursing me..

Used to being "symbolically"..called a poor soul...seeking his blessing's and requesting to stop ignore..
The way I have always given you my heart out..expecting some thing in return was the only mess that put me doubt..
I know..I could not have ever made you understand...
How I actually feel....sinking slowly deep inside the sand..

Worst thing I could do is to come back to you as a consolation prize..
Lucky it may seem to you..but to be true it never felt me nice..
Considering myself as a prized possesion if the feeling I ever wanted you to have for me..
Dropping off was an easy option fro you....else you would have been here....chosing the words for my destiny..

Its all over me..

Every wondered what "IF" I would not have been a part of this story..
Trust me..it would have not made much of a difference by bringing in the much famed glory..
Its the "patience" tested time and again..which gets better of me..
Easiest way to forget is blaming the destiny....and set worries free..

This too has happened a lot many times..and need not deserve an explanation which seek attention..
A humble request is to please pray and think..before the words are spoken without a sanction..
I am not here to judge you by the mere facts...but yes..I might have my own way to narrate the truth...
Call it to be selfish and modified version of reality....and.that's how..I always come out from the woods...

Nevertheless....its the failure again..don't get angry ..but please accept this my miss..
With the reason's that define the world around me..sinking me and my family..deep inside with agony..
What else we can expect..but to accept..I am not good for any one...digesting the "word" with no regrets..
If you would have heard and felt..what I never said..all this is a myth pushing me near my death..

Say it to be other way round..the actions have some how..made me near the edge of self destruction..
Its all the more rules of the "GAME"..blaming it..and moving on with a self elation..
To Laugh is the only adjective and expression I have....explaining my present state...
So much easy is to make use of the "FATE"....to forget that "FATE FULL DATE"...